From a Card Game to a Boxing Match

Last week I talked about writing being a game for me. But what happens if, while playing a game other players start tearing up your cards in order for them to win.
Wasn't it just a game? When did it turn from a game of cards to an all out boxing match?

As a writer I work and socialize with other writers, but when some of those writers start to stomp all over me in order to build themselves up, how do you tell them, "I don't want to work with you any more?"

I'm the first to admit that I have room to grow and learn, of course there's always room for improvement. But supporting other writers instead of squashing them should be every writer's alternative ambition.

It's been my experience to find more supportive editors and agents than fellow writers while muddling through the process.

So in order to inform and support my fellow writers. I'm going to explain the difference between jobs and what they each do.(There's a whole alternate world when it comes to writing and publishing. And we need to know all about the process and how things work.)


1. A writer- Someone who uses words to tell a story.(You & me.)

2. Writing Coach- A person/professional who helps instructs, tutors, trains, and cheers on a writer with the writing process.(If you understand the concept of beginning, middle, and end. Know how to build character, can structure sentences, and have an outline/plot. Have written over three drafts and did a major rewrite on you story. You probably don't need a coach.) Other names: Developmental editor, Bookdoctor.

3. Proofreading Editor- A professional who corrects, identifies, standard grammar, punctuation, and usage in a completed manuscript. (You've written a solid story. It has all the components of a story and now needs a polish in order to make it shine brighter.)

4. Copy Editor- A  professional who proofreads, checks for grammar, spelling, syntax, word usage, styles, formatting, consistency, and clarity. They cross-check references made in the manuscript. (It's a second polishing.) AKA; LineEditor

5. Agent- a person who represents an author in dealing with a publisher.(The professional we send our query letters to.)


6. Publisher- A person/company who prints and distribute printed material. (The almighty one.)

So there we have it. It's all about the step by step process when it comes to writing and we all work at our own pace. My hope is that we support each other in our endeavors and when we can't - be quiet.

Holly Lisle quoted, "If you're doing what you love and you're happy doing it, no one else's success affects you at all."

I'll Keep The Wrinkles

  Now in my late 30's I'm starting to gain a sense of self. The older I get the better life seems to become. I know a lot of people would take back their teenage bodies if they could, but I have to say I wouldn't. Honestly.

   Yes, my body isn't perfect and thin like it had once been, and stretchmarks from childbirth are apparent, however the knowledge I've gained as I've grown up, is worth every wrinkle and stretchmark I have. I feel a sense of pride with them, maybe even wearing them like a badge of honor.

   As a Teenager I felt so conflicted to who I was and what I wanted. I was gangly,  awkward, and confused. I hated high school. Especially because of the social ramifications that existed and I had much bigger dreams than where permitted in the classroom. I found school too restrictive to my personality.

   For example I was constantly in trouble for daydreaming. I don't even remember how many detentions I earned for "not paying attention."  I also was sent to the school councilor for a possible learning disorder. (Which came up inconclusive, and instead I was labeled a slacker.)

   My teen years were not the high point of my life, for me life didn't come into focus until the birth of my children and even then, it was fuzzy at times. I learned so much from watching my children grow and mature and I still learn from them on a daily basis.

   At the age of 19, I decided to marry and become a mother, by twenty two I was divorced with two children, with nothing but a high school diploma. I realized things needed to change and I was responsible for making them change, so I enrolled in college and moved back to my parents house. Can anyone say humble pie?

   Although things didn't turn out the way I had planned, (never did get that college degree I wanted) a year later I met and married a great guy that took on the responsibility of two children. Together we had three more children and have been married 14 years. It hasn't always been easy or perfect, but we're still in love with each other and he's my best friend.

   By the way I still day dream, as a writer it's necessary. However in school no one ever told me it was okay  to do. Or for that matter there was even a useful purpose for it. Instead I had to learn that one on my own.

   Life has an interesting way of teaching you exactly what you need to learn. It's almost like it was tailor made for you. So if there's any teenagers out there that think life sucks, I just want them to know, it does.(At least for now.) But becoming an adult can be a very liberating and exciting. I'm not sure if I'm even there yet? I'm still working on it, even though the wrinkles have replaced the confusion I use to feel.