From a Card Game to a Boxing Match

Last week I talked about writing being a game for me. But what happens if, while playing a game other players start tearing up your cards in order for them to win.
Wasn't it just a game? When did it turn from a game of cards to an all out boxing match?

As a writer I work and socialize with other writers, but when some of those writers start to stomp all over me in order to build themselves up, how do you tell them, "I don't want to work with you any more?"

I'm the first to admit that I have room to grow and learn, of course there's always room for improvement. But supporting other writers instead of squashing them should be every writer's alternative ambition.

It's been my experience to find more supportive editors and agents than fellow writers while muddling through the process.

So in order to inform and support my fellow writers. I'm going to explain the difference between jobs and what they each do.(There's a whole alternate world when it comes to writing and publishing. And we need to know all about the process and how things work.)


1. A writer- Someone who uses words to tell a story.(You & me.)

2. Writing Coach- A person/professional who helps instructs, tutors, trains, and cheers on a writer with the writing process.(If you understand the concept of beginning, middle, and end. Know how to build character, can structure sentences, and have an outline/plot. Have written over three drafts and did a major rewrite on you story. You probably don't need a coach.) Other names: Developmental editor, Bookdoctor.

3. Proofreading Editor- A professional who corrects, identifies, standard grammar, punctuation, and usage in a completed manuscript. (You've written a solid story. It has all the components of a story and now needs a polish in order to make it shine brighter.)

4. Copy Editor- A  professional who proofreads, checks for grammar, spelling, syntax, word usage, styles, formatting, consistency, and clarity. They cross-check references made in the manuscript. (It's a second polishing.) AKA; LineEditor

5. Agent- a person who represents an author in dealing with a publisher.(The professional we send our query letters to.)


6. Publisher- A person/company who prints and distribute printed material. (The almighty one.)

So there we have it. It's all about the step by step process when it comes to writing and we all work at our own pace. My hope is that we support each other in our endeavors and when we can't - be quiet.

Holly Lisle quoted, "If you're doing what you love and you're happy doing it, no one else's success affects you at all."

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Five Tips for Taming the Snarling Writing Beast

Surviving the negative feedback as a writer is all part of the game. I guess comparing it to a game makes it feel less of a conflict than the actual bitter harsh truth.

"I'm sorry, but I didn't like your story." Or "It's too controversial." are just two of the negative comments I've heard about my novels, while completely zoning out the twenty or so who've liked it. Dwelling on the two who didn't like it makes me wonder, "What am I doing wrong?" In order to carry on I've had to change a few few things about myself.

The awful truth is not everyone will like what I've written. There will be times when you feel alone and isolated by the hurtful, nasty, and all consuming ouchie comments.  But surviving it and (pardon the term) licking the wounds will be part of the process.

Five Tips for Taming the Snarling Writing Beast:

1.) You can't win them all. Even your most trusted friends or family may be the toughest critics. Realizing they want you to succeed and are trying to help, can make you see things clearly and help from biting off their heads. Focus on the positive and stop thinking about the two that didn't like it.

2.)  Not everyone can Edit. Editing is a unique skill. Some people think they know what there doing, but really aren't helping you at all. Finding the right type of editor can make or break a manuscript. I suggest finding a professional or asking a English teacher to look it over.

3.) It's okay to be hurt, it's not okay to give up. There will be days where the question, "why am I even doing this?" comes up. For me I couldn't help myself, if I tried. I'm a writer it's what I do. Even on those bad days, I still get up and write something - if it's only a paragraph or two.

4.) Give me pep talk #3. My husband is my biggest supporter. When I'm going through a hard time, or feeling low I call him up and say, "I need a pep talk." He's gotten so good at them that I can actually specify the type I need. (I probably should label them.) Having a good supportive friend who's cheering me on lightens the grueling setbacks.

5.) Be a dreamer. If you don't dream it then how will you know what you want? I dream about being published. I've made up my own business cards, I've practiced how I'd sign my name. I buy clothing I can imagine wearing at a book signing or reading. I figure if  I'm ready and project myself to be that way, then all at once the stars will aline, looking like I just walked right in without any effort. (Cause all the works been done.)

I'd like to hear some of the ways you tame the writing beast, or any internal beast for that matter. Leave a comment below on some tips or ideas that have worked for you.

3 Ways I Survived Spring Break

With the kids all home from spring break I needed a break!

As much as I love and adore being with them, I also find that I've grown accustomed to having them at school. Gone are the days where I changed diapers, hourly feedings, and have to sit down and rock them to sleep. (While going through it I loved every minute a lot of it, but I enjoy them more, the older they get.)

I have to say that spring break can really wear down a parent. Hearing I'm bored 3 times a day, multiplied by five can make you want to scream. (repeat: I am calm and relaxed...om.) So in order to cope with all of it I decided to take a time for me.

First on the list: Get a Mani/Pedi. It's a must. It fills me back up and makes me feel as though I can handle just about anything as long as it doesn't chip my nail or mess up the pretty little flower resting on my toe. (I love getting a design on my big toes, it's like little works of art you wear.)

Second on my list: Go to the Park. Make them tired, so they can't whine, complain, or fight. (being a referee makes me feel exhausted and tired. I think a diversion might be the thing we'll all need.)

The last thing on my list: Go on a Date. Of course, with my hubby. I love spending time with him. I love eating out, just to know you're eating something anyone else cooked, and not hearing, "I don't like meatloaf."(Although the one complaining  likes meatballs.  I haven't told him I use the same recipe for them both, minus the ground sausage. Weird kid!)

I think I'll even buy myself a nice creamy chocolate bar to push it right over the top, going from survival to indulgence.

April Showers, Bring...

More rain. Living in the Pacific Northwest can become very daunting when it comes to the beginning of spring. After it's been raining for the last two months. February and March end, and along comes April - to keep the rain pouring down.

Although we do tend to get glimpses of a shiny bright orb(Which is hard to identify with, because we so little of it.) abundantly pouring down light into our gray skies, tall evergreens, and six inch deep puddles. I have to wonder when it will all stop and actually become tolerable? I can say it loudly and proudly...I'm sick of the rain.

I keep thinking of the childhood song, Rain, Rain, go away...